Re: A 22 year old guy and a 13 year old girl?
If you don't mind can I change the question.. how would you react if a 22yr old approached you at that age?
I'm genuinely interested. Only honest answers please!
Completely frightened! & could not tell my parents, as a age, you would think it was your fault. However, even at that age I think I knew what was right & wrong
Re: A 22 year old guy and a 13 year old girl?
8 year age gap is all fine and good when the girl is 30 and the guy 38, girl 21 and guy 29, girl 25 and the guy 33. Age difference gap when the girl is 13 and the guy is 22 is very much a generation gap. Its not okay and it should not be seen as something 'common' in any way, especially in the times we're living. Even in countries like Pak, India, Bangladesh a 22 guy would've been beaten to death almost if parents caught him romancing their 13 year old...lets not think that in places Pakistan you can get away with such things.
This is now though. In Pakistan, a girl getting married at 15 or 16 is not that common anymore but in some places people still start thinking of rishtay as soon as the girl gets her period because she is now baligh.
Im not saying Im for it. Im not saying its right. Im saying its been done for ages and ages now so people in certain places dont really view it as wrong. Its a way of life. Is it wrong? Im not sure. My grandmother was married at 13 and she was one of the most admired people I ever knew. Our religion does not condemn it either...which leads me to wonder if its really wrong.
Oh and one more thing, by the above Im not saying a 13 year old girl is necessarily ready for a full blown marriage per se...but if a 13 year old is engaged to a 22 year old...is that really harmful for her development? Provided, its not an abusive relationship.
Re: A 22 year old guy and a 13 year old girl?
Humbert Humbert would approve.
Re: A 22 year old guy and a 13 year old girl?
This is now though. In Pakistan, a girl getting married at 15 or 16 is not that common anymore but in some places people still start thinking of rishtay as soon as the girl gets her period because she is now baligh.
Im not saying Im for it. Im not saying its right. Im saying its been done for ages and ages now so people in certain places dont really view it as wrong. Its a way of life. Is it wrong? Im not sure. My grandmother was married at 13 and she was one of the most admired people I ever knew. Our religion does not condemn it either...which leads me to wonder if its really wrong.
Oh and one more thing, by the above Im not saying a 13 year old girl is necessarily ready for a full blown marriage per se...but if a 13 year old is engaged to a 22 year old...is that really harmful for her development? Provided, its not an abusive relationship.
...Just because girls start getting rishtey once she hits puberty, doesn't mean parents allow dating or romantic involvement with the potential future partner. My mother was 'taken' as a young teen, but she only talked to my dad few days before the wedding , some reletives had their eyes on my sister when she was young, but that didn't mean my sister started mingling with that boy. I'm not too concerned about what happened to my grandmother 60-70 years ago, its not relevant to the case we're talking about. That young lady is medical student, I doubt her parents were looking to get her married at the age of 14, like what happened to your or my grandmother. As with getting engaged at young age and its effect on person development, I guess there's reason why most find out that they're taken when they hit certain age. In desi terms, engagment could also mean your parents deciding rishta with a box mithai exchanged while you're in school.
Re: A 22 year old guy and a 13 year old girl?
Doing what ? If it is what I think it is - forget acceptable, I think its illegal in most countries.
Re: A 22 year old guy and a 13 year old girl?
Okay. Would you find it acceptable if they were either dating, in a relationship or married?
Dating, I'd think it's weird.
As far as relationship, what's the different between this and dating or this and marriage?
Married, well this one would require a detailed answer but I think what you're looking for is would I find it something universally wrong and in all cases. So to that I'll say no, there are certain circumstances I wouldn't find it unacceptable. 9 years age difference is greater than I'm used to seeing, but then again, if the people involved are ok with it, who am I to judge?
Somehow I doubt this question was asked regarding a 22 year old brother and a 13 year old sister. Or a 22 year old male teacher and a 13 year old girl student. Or a 22 year old Jedi Master and a 13 year old youngling.
The way the original question was phrased, it did not rule out anything.
Re: A 22 year old guy and a 13 year old girl?
Whats the verdict?
Is this acceptable or not?
whats wrong if they are brother and sister ?
whats wrong if they are cousins or have any blood relation?
whats wrong if they are just clean friends?
whats wrong if they are simply engaged? ( in Paki culture)
but yes,
it would be wrong if they are involved in immature activities!
it would be wrong if they get married at this age!
The age difference between them is 22-13 = 9, when the girl is 18 the guy will be 27, but when the girl is 30, the guy will be 39, and I dont see any problem at that time!
Re: A 22 year old guy and a 13 year old girl?
Whats the verdict?
Is this acceptable or not?
girls mature waay b4 guys .. n if they realy love each othr than so wat is the big deal ? ..
Re: A 22 year old guy and a 13 year old girl?
whether its dating or an engagement..surely the decent and healthy thing would be waiting for a few years!
the math involved is not even the question.. it will not be a big deal when the girl is 18 and guy 27 or when girl is 30 and guy 39 but it will be if she is just 13.. its just not healthy