marriage is a hi point in our lives, believe it or not. :>
what do couples need to do, besides consummation of marriage…
to come closer and understand each others’ personalities, likes and dislikes and general approach to life and its challenges, to become lasting friends.
any ideas or shareable experiences - welcomed.
please chime in.
Re: 1st one year of marriage
Learn to compromise.
Re: 1st one year of marriage
I think couples need to focus on what works for them. Don't let other people tell you what your role in a marriage should or shouldn't be. Work with your other half and figure out how the both of you can complement each other. Also, I think respect and love are a must. . . and there should be absolutely no demanding. The minute one person starts demanding from the other is the minute resentment starts to build. Also, i think you shouldn't expect your other half to do anything that you wouldn't be willing to do. And it helps if you know that there are going to be amazing days and there are going to be not so great days but at the end of the day, it all comes down to love.
I could write a lot more but you get the gist.
Re: 1st one year of marriage
love reading your posts…:k:
Re: 1st one year of marriage
what i think and experienced was that the first year or so of marriage is the most important and toughest....(especially if it is an arranged marriage where u 2 really dont know each other well...)whatever mutual understanding,respect and love and affection develops in the initial year makes the basis of a happy married life together.....there are going t o be conflicts and clashes of ideas and personalities,but both will have to learn to compromise and be flexible...and with the passage of time such an understanding,respect and love develops tand it all seems to work as if u 2 were always together.....
the key also is to try to avoid any outside/inlaw's(either ones)interference.they should be respected but at the end it is the husband and wife who have to understand each other to live together.
for a marriage to be happy and ever lasting,its important to keep in mind that the most important thing is ur wife/husband and nothing else....then everything else works well too...!!
Re: 1st one year of marriage
Marriage is a wonderful blessing. A time for two people to meet in person in order to become closer to Allah. That should be the main focus and goal. With that kept in mind, it becomes a lot clearer as to how to handle different situations. Two people may know or not know each other from before, but when they start to actually "live" together, its a whole new game. Both need to be patient and accepting of each other. Learn from each other and try to adapt to the new journey that they are starting. They are coming from two different walks of life and so to come together at the table is not always easy.
First few years are a real tough adjustment but both need to compromise and learn to adjust accordingly. As humans, we all have flaws within ourselves. So, instead of focusing on the other person's mistakes, if one looks at themself to see how they can better themself, then you have a good start to married life.
Its tough and yet its a beautiful expereince. Beyond the music, the dancing, dholkis and bangles, a life of maturity and responsibilities is what both have to accept. Be patient and success will eventually come.
(p.s. I attended a wonderful workshop on marriage/spouse & relationships at our local mosque today). It was a great experience. I am glad that I attended. After several years of being married now, I still learnt things today that made me realise that I have so much more still to learn.
Re: 1st one year of marriage
thanks every one, amazing posts and advice. may those of u who are proudly and happily married, may ever so remain content and prosperous. :>
best,
DUSH
Re: 1st one year of marriage
Re: 1st one year of marriage
sex, sex and then some more.
Re: 1st one year of marriage
OOPs just saw the post right before mine- as some have said above (solar, diva and chips) also- let go of your Ego and make working things out and resolving issues more important than maintaining pride or proving you're right.
Re: 1st one year of marriage
communicate
Re: 1st one year of marriage
u beter search on Google ..........This is a little sensitive issue ........if u really interested to know ? Gupans might not be able to help u ...
what u expect from these Scholars ?
u will got a lot material .........as this is a vast and multi dimentional topic..different ppl hav dif type of experiences ...its not necessary that these exp.. work in ur case ..........
Re: 1st one year of marriage
what about for the poor souls who are not happy in their marriage what dua you have for them dushwari.
Re: 1st one year of marriage
dear uncle g
this is a nice, one word response. comm is the key.
thanks
dush