12 Things NOT to Say To a Police Officer
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I can’t reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)
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Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged
in. -
Aren’t you the guy from the Village People?
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Hey, you must’ve been doin’ about 125 mph to keep up with me.
Good job! -
Are You Andy or Barney?
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I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to
be a police officer. -
You’re not gonna check the trunk, are you?
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I pay your salary!
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Gee, Officer! That’s terrific. The last officer only gave me a
warning, too! -
Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us
does. -
I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no
other cars around. That’s how far ahead of me they are. -
When the Officer says “Gee Son . . . your eyes look red, have
you been drinking?” You probably shouldn’t respond with, “Gee
Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?”
Every man is wise when attacked by a mad dog; fewer when pursued by a mad woman; only the wisest survive when attacked by a mad notion.