Re: What would you do...
hanibal,
you are so genuine when you said it, thanks.
sacrifice is not one sided and it should not be, nor expected to be.
circumstances at somebody's end many a times are practically air-tight for the one who backs off.
but it is very true that attachment in companionate love cannot be forced nor imposed.
one can only do so much of clearing up of the air.
rest is the ‘dundh’ in the eyes of the one who remains scared or ambivalent.
and then, someone may not be able to walk with you at this point in life,
being in the situation they are in...
ultimately, some time sooner or later, the evocation is of a dream unrealized is realized and the things in destiny may turn around, of course it is locked from the humans as then it does not have the effect which it otherwise will have – pleasant and surprise.
at least in case of the sensitive and caring person.
it is not about being desperate or being vengeful or even pleading – it has to do with regard, in relationships bets don’t work, nor do plethora of expectations.
it is solely about the loss of a relationship that was not handled correctly, on purpose by elements who hold someone down at the expense of their personal happiness.
there are examples of blessed marriages and relationships that remain stead fast for all times to come, only because the element of care and true regard or respect and trust in each other was strong enough to pull on the weight placed by fears or doubts or external limitations as in financial and parental pressures – emotional comfort, physical intimacy and planning a non-turbulent future together, with all sincerity cannot be discounted, unless the person who gives in or walks out, has been confused all along or got so unnerved due to personal lack of clear judgment and took seriously only the grain of salt, in a pot full of sugar, if you will.
in any event, ‘the second chance’ is not a sin nor will it be difficult to obtain if intentions are clear and stronger than ever before. in this case, it may well be embraced, after the 'life's bursted paani ka bulbula' is made a goodly justified by some reasonable and truthful account of what hampered it, a short or a long time ago, in the first place.
when ending is death and life is too short, why live to please others.
letting in the shine of someone who can be with you, is noticed, but then when it is not affirmed. that is a great loss.
the need to belong to someone who you can come home to, after a tiring day of work and making a patient change in the world, you do want someone waiting for you, who cares about you and who would be of trust ably hopeful because you are with that person, because that person truly cares about being with you, is natural. when you take the time to get to know someone, you clearly see the good in the person (with the bad), then second guessing is
like insulting the other person. and that's not healthy for both sides.
so the life must be a lesson for the 'sensitive one', over time, to realize that what got done was unfair and can be undone and that this repairing gesture wont be shunned out, just for the sake of shunning it out.
a created impasse or inertia, cannot be held responsible for a live thinking, feeling and behaving human body to stick with the mistake that was made and what happens as an outcome: embitter ness or misunderstandings that do take place – can be healed if one wanted to – with hard work though, as the greater stake is in the future not in the past or the present…
but rarely people will attend to this fine distinction between destiny and inflicted state of wrong decision making or acceptance of something totally pressed upon oneself – that is actually really painful for the one who knows that the other person was not comfortable with the treatment received from those who have been inflicting it upon that person – for a longer time – it can even be blood relations, you are right – she did make a sacrifice, maybe, but then where was her sense of honesty to you?
families should support the happiness of people as adults, not instigate nor make a mischief of the life of someone who is always only giving and whenever comes the time for this person to make a bond with someone for own sake – that person is zero-summed.
anger does arise and leaves with immeasurable hurt as its consequence, which is why reluctant but deliberate parting must never be from a distance as it leaves a clear impression of guilt and misery.
& as for whatever else is or kept, unknown and unseen and hidden, one must leave it at that.
I so happy that some body understood what i said, thankyou and i mean it, you don't what u have constructed with your few words.
are u the real hannibal?? he was from africa and dint mind dust at all…
makhlooq (read dil phaink aashqon) kay faaiday kay liye poora shair arz hai
nops.