Re: What if your husband doesn’t want the baby?
He should have thought about it before doing the act …as if he did not know how babies are made and how those 2 came into this world.
Abortion is not an option and she should not let it happen.
Re: What if your husband doesn't want the baby?
Its too late to talk about "he should have" or "she should have"
Only solution now is to sort it out b/w them. Legally and Islamically , he can not force her to abort he baby but she also have to think about the long term consequences. Having a un-wanted child living b/w them for the rest of the life its gonna be hard on the kid if father's "un-want-ness" changes into hate or at least if it results in un-fair treatment.
Re: What if your husband doesn't want the baby?
The wife can discuss the matter with her husband that abortion is not allowed in Islam and they would be doing a sin by aborting the child. It is their child and it deserves the same love and treatment as their other two children and should not be killed. She should request him to review his deicsion and one more child should not harm their life... although they should be careful in the future. Abortion is definitely not a good option. She might try to involve her parents in laws if they have a good relationship with the couple... May be they can make their son understand...
Re: What if your husband doesn't want the baby?
I would be shocked at this kind of attitude toward life as well. I'm not saying to be irresponsible and procreate like bunnies. But if they have been blessed with a pregnancy, abortion should not be even a thought in this case. Fine it wasn't planned, so what? Life is not meant to be lived with every minute planned. And the fact that he cannot see this for the blessing that it is is really disgusting. It makes me want to simultaneously vomit and throw things at him. He needs to spend some time in reflection, prayer, and with sensible people and a loving family. Then maybe he'll talk sense.
Re: What if your husband doesn't want the baby?
The dude here is being very honest about his feelings towards the issue. Both of them agreed that 2 was it. If he's pushed beyond his limits, which is where he seems to be at, he may not be able to continue being as good of a father he may be right now. Is it worth it to risk him turning into a bad father for all 3 kids? I don't think so.
Also, population is one of our biggest problems. I wouldn't know what it's like to have a baby and want more, but why don't you want to stop? Like someone mentioned in either this or the other thread that it takes more than money to raise a child well. And that includes a good father.
But the child exists now .It's one thing to talk before and say, oh it's not really a good idea. But once the embryo/fetus/baby exists, and there is no legitimate reason to kill it, how can they talk so lightly of getting rid of it, rather than thinking, okay we're going to need to make some adjustments to be the best parents we can be.
Re: What if your husband doesn't want the baby?
trojans dont stand a chance against well oiled machismo paki baby makin machines!
ahh haa :D.....
like most have alread said
i don't think it would be a pleasant environment to bring in a child that is not really wanted by the father. as much as the mother tries to convince him of why religiously they should welcome her/him into the world. small chance of him being happy about something like this especially after he's done research on which clinic to have the abortion
Re: What if your husband doesn't want the baby?
He's been good so far...they've been married 7 years and she's never complained about him. To us, they look like a normal couple with normal lives, but this is really strange.
That dude needs to be shamed in public for being such a douchebag. B/c really...that word doesn't even begin to cover it.
Re: What if your husband doesn't want the baby?
For those of you who are saying that the father will resent the child later on in life.....is there a chance that may be he will change his mind when seeing the baby?
I know it's not something one wants to depend upon--"he will change"--but I was told that when I was born my father was disappointed I wasn't a boy and he didnt' come see me in the hospital. But eventually he warmed up to me, and he loved/loves me like any father loves his daughter
Re: What if your husband doesn't want the baby?
a-hole should where a trojan next time.
Perhaps there WAS a-hole in it.....
Re: What if your husband doesn't want the baby?
So she's been talking to him to change his mind from the religious perspective. He seems to be quiet about it at this point. Let's hope he changes his mind.
Re: What if your husband doesn't want the baby?
Why not make a compromise that she can have the baby but they will give it up for adoption?
Re: What if your husband doesn't want the baby?
Sorry but I think this guy is being a complete pillock. If they both agreed on 2 then he really should have put something on the end of it. It takes two to tango and he is just as responsible as she is . they should have practised safe sex and all that but really, I think with the amount of money being spent on IVF for infertile couples and those who cannot have kids of their own, this man needs to really wake up and smell the coffee. Muslims are meant to be anti-abortion, Allah provides like he always does. We are not living in the dark ages where everything is scarce. Like the original poster says, her hubby is a good provider etc so i can't see what the problem is. She is young she can always get a job and like someone else mentioned, if these two kids are getting on his nerves, that would really worry me. I suggest this couple seek help from their elders, failing that, they really need to discuss what their next step should be. I feel that the hubby is getting nervous about the whole thing, feeling as though another mouth would perhaps threaten his relationship with the wife or not beiing able to provide financially?