Re: Sunnah Way...
But we do hear traditions (quoting a lot af ajr) for celebrating these occasions. Eid Milad u Nabi got the status of third Eid and celebrated like Christmas. Someone told me that certain people wear new clothes and give eidi to their children and the day is not far away, when they start offering Eid Namaz on this day.
Same goes true for Aashura and doing Matam is considered to be the way to salvation.
If we think people do what ever makes them comfortable and close to God, according to their understanding. I personally don't believe on such ahadees which quote biggest reward / punishment for small acts.. Because this makes religion only the name of rituals and supernatural things.
Brother, I assure you that no one consider Eid-e-Milad-ul-Nabi as fard. All perform Eid-e-Milad-ul-Nabi as remembrance and anniversary of Prophet (SAW) birth, considering that celebration as good deed, no more and no less. The most important thing about Eid-e-Milad-ul-Nabi is that people celebrate it because they love Prophet (SAW) and thus show their feelings for the day Allah gifted Prophet (SAW) to this world. As for rewards (Ajr), that is secondary for people who perform this celebration due to love of Prophet (SAW). Those who think of rewards, they believe that celebrating Eid-e-Milad-ul-Nabi would make Allah happy too, and thus they believe (actually hope) that there would be Ajr for this celebration as one believes that there would be ajr for any performed deed one considers good.
Same believe is about Ashura when Muslims, not considering fard but due to inner feelings, show grieves on inflicted atrocities that Prophet (SAW) family suffered at Karbala, and thus by doing so they try to join in the grief of Prophet (SAW) in front of Allah. As for matam, I believe no Shia do matam considering it as fard, rather do it considering it as remembrance of pain and suffering on anniversary of atrocities inflicted on family of Prophet (SAW).
Actually, Islam promotes remembrance and anniversaries. Haj is remembrance and anniversary of prayer that Adam (AS) did along with Hawa (AS) for forgiveness at Arafat (where they first met and recognised each other on earth). Allah made Hajis to run between Safa and Marwa and thus inflict pain of running on oneself as remembrance of pain and suffering at anniversary of what Bibi Hajra (AS) suffered while looking/searching for water for Ismail (AS). Hitting Shaitan with stones and Sacrifice of animal during Haj is also remembrance and anniversary of Ibrahim (AS) act. And so on.
As for rewards, it is up to Allah who is giver of all rewards (or no rewards) for any acts, be they fard, sunnah, nafil, or perceived good deeds, be that deed is remembering and celebrating Prophet (SAW) birthday, giving food to hungry or financial help to poor.