Really complicated Issue

Lifestyle Relationships
21

Re: Really complicated Issue

You really think taking another wife won't have the same outcome?? Esp 2 MONTHS after his wife gave birth??

22

Re: Really complicated Issue

A woman who can not compromise is like a tree that does not sway in the wind. Its like the Aesop fable. In this case this is a marriage that is already broken, its been broken for months it not years and the based on the information so far the woman does not want to fix it. So tell him to walk away. If he wants he should take custody of the kids or have joint custody. But a married couple that doesn't even live in the same house by choice? Dead marriage.

23

Re: Really complicated Issue

It is in my opinion better then breaking a marriage.

24

Re: Really complicated Issue

If he really wants to give it a shot , here’s what he can do :-

1- Stop complaining about her not cooking and hire a cook at home (with other issues at hand , wife not cooking should be the last thing he complains about , maybe she just doesn’t like cooking)

2- Find a good marriage counselor and both of them should visit him/her.

3 - After the first few sessions with the counselor , if things start shaping up for the good , he could send the kids to the grandparents for a week or so and plan a vacation with his wife to a place she has wanted to go for long or a place she likes .

4 - While trying to make it work , he should simply ignore stuff she might do which he disliles and appreciate stuff she might do which he likes.

25

Re: Really complicated Issue

Your friend is a bleeep bleeeep.......he must have done something evil......the woman is a victim here not perptrator.....(this thread is going nowhere untill you say this line)

26

Re: Really complicated Issue

Your friend is a jerk! I can't believe he discussed his sex life with you. Wth

27

Re: Really complicated Issue

Ye tou picture ka aik rukh hai . I m sure there is something jo uski wife k mind mein hai.
Koi b lady apne ghar ko jaan bujh kr brbaad ni krti.
So uske issues wo janna bht zaruri hai.
n zahir hai is k liye brey buzurgo k sath beth kr baat honi chahye ya phr koi aisa jo is qism k prbs solve krta ho.
Ye do families ka prb hai , sirf us bndey ya uski wife ka ni !

28

Re: Really complicated Issue

As far as I can read, there isn't much of it to discuss. The guy probably needed advice, he talked to a friend. He didn't go to the masjid and shout it out on the loud speaker or anything.

Don't get how this makes him a jerk.

29

Re: Really complicated Issue

I wonder if this is the tool that called me off some website about a year ago. He too, was looking for a biwi about 2 months after leaving his wife and newborn.

30

Re: Really complicated Issue

A mother of five year old kid and cooks nothing at home for 45 days does it make sense to anyone here? :s. Okay lets say She dislikes her husband but what about the kid? She gave birth to the kid, ,, rasied him for five years.... she must been cooking and feeding her son all this time right? . As far as i can see your friend needs a consultant. What about wife's side of the story? Why portraying wife as evil here? You friend should look at his own actions first where he is doing it wrong the most ironic part is in these years sixs he never got a single chance to ask her straightforward that whats her problem? Six years and your friend has no idea why? :s.

31

Re: Really complicated Issue

Heres the girls side of the story: hubby left her all alone with MIL for 9 months of horrible pregnancy, wasnt there even for delivery of 2nd baby, n now comes to visit for a month but instead of helping out with new baby who feeds every two hrs day n night, he is expecting home cooked meals!! With two kids to take care of, all alone, i also wouldnt give a crap if my hubby visited for only 45 days.

32

Re: Really complicated Issue

^ how do you know all that ?

33

Re: Really complicated Issue

The problem with such issues is, both the partners prove they are innocent and will win you over to their side given a chance. I bet his wife's friends will feel the same for her like you do for your friend. Children are the most innocent party here. I dont see any reason they should suffer. Which they will anyway, either parents separate or stay together with such an attitude. Marriage is a relation od respect and care for eachother, if they have lost it anyway, they should work on bringing it back to their relationship. For the sake of their children, now when they exist. Nothing else is going to work, I am afraid.

34

Re: Really complicated Issue

She is clearly not happy with this marriage. She was never attracted to him and was perhaps pressured to marry by parents or circumstances.