it takes a lot of time and dedication to develop a good relationship like the one my mom has with her in-laws…not many people (especially these days) are willing to take the time to make it work.
After seveal years of hearing false accusations, manipulations, lies etc etc, finally a few kids down the road, and a whole lot of patience on my moms part… she finally got the respect she deserved.
so there is light at the end of tunnel
what’s unfortunate is that people give up before reaching the end.
it takes a lot of time and dedication to develop a good relationship like the one my mom has with her in-laws....not many people (especially these days) are willing to take the time to make it work.
After seveal years of hearing false accusations, manipulations, lies etc etc, finally a few kids down the road, and a whole lot of patience on my moms part... she finally got the respect she deserved.
so there is light at the end of tunnel :)
what's unfortunate is that people give up before reaching the end.
i suppose, you need a whole lot of patience and have faith in Allah(swt)...
unfortunetly, my mum's in-laws aren't the same and i don't think they'd ever learn. khair it's their loss :)
i have no problem w. it. i personally coudnt just cuz its hard to have the same values and esp when it come to children what do u do? (plus i think white men cheat way more in general than a desi would)
oh and yeah i think its more desi girls marrying white guys nowadays.....no only cuz desi want thier girls to stay home but they demand she be a doctor, over 5'8" oh and then he wants her to stay home and not work and watch 10 kids...no wonder desi girls are sick of it and moving on and not putting up w. the outragousness of desi men and thier unrealistic standards. (plus they are usually hotter)
I love how everyone dances around the race issue and tries to keep it just a 'religious' issue. If a South Asian man or woman married someone 'white' who either converted or already was muslim, there might be grumbling, but generally it would be accepted. If someone South Asian married a non-white, but still light-skinned person, malaysian, chinese, there would be more grumbling, but generally, things would eventually be accepted and it would be ok.
Now lastly, if a South Asian man (and good Lord forbid, lest her own family kill her first) or a woman married a BLACK person.... oh my. Our racism and discrimination would come out in ALL its ugly colors. Aunties for years to come would have the juciest piece of gossip, the person doing the marrying an example of what every parent does NOT want their kids to turn out like. We as muslims are very welcoming of our African Muslim brothers and sisters, as long as they marry within their race and leave ours, particularly our girls, alone. The whiter the skin, the higher we automatically value the person. Is it religion? No. Is it culture... oh yeah. But we disguise it well, since we have no blacks living in our societies demanding to be treated equally, and pat ourselves on the back for our racial color-blindness. :D
What I want to know is why almost all standards go out the door as soon the guy finds a "gori". Everyone seems to have really high standard when it comes to Pakistani girls; she must be educated, beautiful, tall, well mannered, good family, should fit into the family, must have no past, and what not. But when it comes to gori, all sacrifices are doable, her past doesn't matter anymore, fat, skinny, short, ugly, it's all good, if she doesn't get along with family, then kick your family out and so on. On top of that no one cares about her family. working class, royalty, poor or rich, its all acceptable.
What I want to know is why almost all standards go out the door as soon the guy finds a "gori". Everyone seems to have really high standard when it comes to Pakistani girls; she must be educated, beautiful, tall, well mannered, good family, should fit into the family, must have no past, and what not. But when it comes to gori, all sacrifices are doable, her past doesn't matter anymore, fat, skinny, short, ugly, it's all good, if she doesn't get along with family, then kick your family out and so on. On top of that no one cares about her family. working class, royalty, poor or rich, its all acceptable.
Seen it many times.
100% agree! its uually fat goris too cuz they usually cant do any better. sorry but seen it.
What I want to know is why almost all standards go out the door as soon the guy finds a "gori". Everyone seems to have really high standard when it comes to Pakistani girls; she must be educated, beautiful, tall, well mannered, good family, should fit into the family, must have no past, and what not. But when it comes to gori, all sacrifices are doable, her past doesn't matter anymore, fat, skinny, short, ugly, it's all good, if she doesn't get along with family, then kick your family out and so on. On top of that no one cares about her family. working class, royalty, poor or rich, its all acceptable.
Seen it many times.
that is because
when they will have kids, their kids will be fair skinned....so besides education, demeanor
its skin color which is the #1 criteria for pakistani families
