NO man, never watched monty python.... my inspiration was purely on Bernini's sculpture, Ecstasy of St. Theresa.
He portrayed a dream of St. Theresa in which she saw an angel with a shear in his hand is piercing it through her heart and she is dying but yet she felt joy in it. In his sculpture, Bernini portrayed the feeling described by St. Theresa by applying impressionism of a woman having sexual intercourse.
There, now you have it. Now you know the depth of my kinkiness ;-)
Ny Munnay
tu lota pakar kar khet ki taraf chala ja. NY city mein khait naheen hain toh back yard mein hi fasal uga lo. Thats what you are missing.
warna ghar mein khudi lagwa lo, goray poochain toh keh dena keh its afloor urinal ya foot washing station.
What a mature and Intellectual conversation between you guys…???
MS
Some factual info, if you really want to still live in the USA but find a way out of your problems....
Reasons for constipation prevalent in the west:
Draw your own conclusions.
Shirin is right! Think about the amount of exercise you got in Pak, compared with now, and also with the types of food you ate there. Your lifestyle has probably changed since you got here. In other words, start jogging and eat your veggies. I don't have any of the problems that you mention :). And don't leave so much reading material in the bathroom and you won't be so tempted to hang out there.
Zara
NY
I have one word for ya
Soloflex.
or ummmm another word
Running shoes
or the last option
ExLax
X-Factor:
warna ghar mein khudi lagwa lo, goray poochain toh keh dena keh its afloor urinal ya foot washing station.<<<
Yar my man, you have brilliant ideas. My butt thanks you.
Dear Shirin, yes, it is junk food and lack of activity. But I also believe that part of it is genetic.
Dear Maim Sahib. Why is this not a mature topic? I am sorry but I beg to disagree. I think it is very mature and responsible discussion. There are many folks here who suffer from this condition. By sharing our experiences and common knowledge and useful remedies, we are taking this challenge heads on. I am, in fact, interested in staring a Support Group, (SAKA – South Asian Kabzee Anonymous). In SAKA we will discuss how to defeat this enemy and we will have 12-step program. Do I hear any yeaaaaaahhhhhhhs?
Ghalib Yara, weed is bad for this condition. Hafeem is also bad. Don’t get me wrong, weed is good, but not good if you suffer from Kabz.
Dear Zara, I do exercise and I do run. My diet is pretty good also. I think part of it is my bad genes.
Fraud yara. Ex-lax (jamal ghota). Man, I am allergic to that material. I know what is in it that causes me itches and rash. I don’t like ex-lax. I think Metamucel is not bad. My fiber intake is pretty good, and I do drink prune juice also.
Any more useful remedies??? Any desi unskhas?
Well, here in Italy they prescribe boiled finocchi (fennel - the vegetable, not the seed). And boiled beetroot works good.
BTW if it is genetic then why doesn't it bother you in Pakistan?
Actually people who suffer from this condition are usually happy in my house because we eat QUANTITIES of salad of all different types, something you can't get very easily in Pakistan. Tell you what, make sure you get 5 servings of vegetables a day and I guarantee you that your constipation will disappear.
Something else, make sure you drink enough (water)- 8 glasses a day - see if that doesn't help. Because of the cold we tend to have less thirst and the central heating robs body fluids that we don't replace adequately.
And cut down on coffe and tea. Besides all the stuff listed above... try and let us know what the results are!
Shirin,
I am not sure about the coffee part... it actually seems to have contrary effects on me. I think everybody has a different chemistry of body. Different things work differently for different people. Is that so?
I heard of DrCoop.com but Shirin is all set to start DrPoop.com 
bwahahahahhahaha
Yar NYA,
I HAVE a suggestion for you,
Say Bismillah
** AND TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND PUSH DOWN, PUSH DOWN BABBIE, PUSH HARD PUSH PUSH PUSH
**
AHHAAAAAAAA, SEE IT WAS NOT HARD.
http://www.pak.org/gupshup/pagal.gif
You are Welcome… 
Dear Roman, it's true that things can work differently for different people but... it's also true that when we are used to eating/drinking/breathing somethings we have a different sort of reaction when we first stop them. Tea and coffee are generally considered diutetics and their long term effects are often different from short term effects. I have a friend who was a coca cola addict - now you know it is full of caffeine. When she stpped drinking it she had all sorts of problems, including insomnia (!!) for a couple of months but now she is over that and her health has improved significantly. Now if she slips and drinks coke she can't sleep. I guess that what I'm saying is that your body adapts to what you do it as well.... so better treat it with respect.
John,
Are you holding his hand too? ;-)
Shirin,
You are right. I feel that body does adopt to what you were used to eating. I think I can safely declare myself addicted to coffee now.