i know several people who are married to their cousins. i actually dont have a position either way.
** legbreakgoogly ** but i just have to ask one question what is the “eww” factor in cousin marriages??? why are repulsed by this concept???
I also married my cousin. My mamu's daughter but she grew up in Pakistan, while I was in Amreeka.
I was opposed to it in the beginning but I put my trust in Allah SWT above all else. and mashallah, everything has worked out.
I think we Pakistani's lean more toward cousin marriages because keeping it all in the family takes the guess work out of it. Family climates can be adjusted when it's all in the family
I would not recommend it to my children but if they do wish to proceed, I would not object to it.
I have seen the other side as well. I don't want to say it's directly related but I do have a few cousins that ended up with abnormal children.
I do have that fear running in the back of my head as well but once again, whenever in doubt, ALWAYS put your trust in Allah SWT. .
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Nilu: *
Ive also heard that if you marrying ur cousin or niece
that the chance is if u want childeren could be a problem.
and im really scared now coz im married with a cousin
of my dad.
Em.. i told before that my sis in law married her cousin and one
of her child has grown problems i think.
[/QUOTE]
Nilu Dont worry about it at all. I have studied genetics more than any dork who is claiming that couisn marraiges could result in infertility. There is no scientific fact plus the risk factor of infertility lies whetre u marry in family or outside. As far as childbirth with defects are concerned , there is also no rationilty of child genome having defective genes if the parenst follow the same fililal line. Relax
Btw I am also marrying my cousin soon inshallah :)
and yeah shikra is right ..shadi say phelay sab bhai behn hotay hain :D
I married outside my family, infact the families didnt even knew eachother 2 months before the Nikkah.
The idea of marring a cousin doesnt appeal to me. (sorry) I rejected too many cousins
I don´t think there is any English word for the rishta of Humzulf. Humzulf means the husband of the sister of ones wife.
So when I said that my cousin is my Humzulf, it means that the wife of my cousin and my wife are sisters.
To be cousins are like sisters. No one would like the iea of wqedding a sister, so why wed a cousin?
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by legbreakgoogly: *
To be cousins are like sisters. No one would like the iea of wqedding a sister, so why wed a cousin?
[/QUOTE]
To you cousins might be like sisters. Why do you assume that it´s the same for everyone else?
I didnt suggest it was the case for others.
i married my mamus son nearly three years ago and mashallah I am very happy with him, i only really met him once when i went to pak, as he was there and i was in the UK, i didnt really see him as a brother or anything, but i wudnt marry any of my close guy cousins here in the uk, its like an unsed rule between us
jahan par kismet mein likha hai vohi hoga..
wha?
Re: How many of you married your cousins?
Not true. When you marry somebody from totally different genetic group, chance of a defective kid is next to zero. Your argument does not wash. Actually for some reason, more the difference between boy and girl genetically, more robust and good looking the kids. Look at Canada’s Indians and Eskimos. These two people are very closely married. You can see on their faces a lack of definition like a leper and they are not exactly in the top 10% of Canadian population in intellligence. I have posted at another thread a study done recently by a muslim institute on this subject. It clearly points to opposite to what you are saying. I think you are stating your views just for religious reasons not because you know anything about the subject.
Re: How many of you married your cousins?
people in my family marry their cousins all the time...my sister and one of my brothers married their first cousin. Me and my other brother married one of our distant cousins (to this day, i still dont know how exactly my hubby and I are related....).
I dont think i read any advantages of being married to a first cousin, so let me tell u one (in my opinion)...
My sister married my chachu's son, and even though they are still married off and lives separate from my parents, she still part of that same family. Whenever she goes back to pakistan, she stays at my dad's house (also our chachu's home by default), and the other family members (aunts, uncles, cousins) are close to her and etc....
As for my case, even though i married a distant relative (our families met the first time while i was getting engaged), I still dont feel that same closeless/acceptance from my (extended) family that my sister does. Whenever I go back to Paksitan, I woudl only visit my dads home, and stay with my inlaws (who live in another city). Its hard to explain, but whenever I would go to my parents home, I would feel like I was "parai" (I think thats the right word).
Does anyone else ever feel like that?
This is my opinion, but I did see the opposite effect occur as well....my aunt has two bahus..one is her neice and the other was out of family. She treats her own neice like crap, and the other bahu is the queen...i hate when she does that...
And about the genetic defects and such...im a scientist, but still its all BS! couple who are cousins have the same chance of having a child with a defect as couples who are not cousins....is it just me, or do I notice more white kids having all these cancers than desi kids?????
Re: How many of you married your cousins?
How many scientific studies done in UK and India are you going to ingore? You a scientist? You got me fooled.
Re: How many of you married your cousins?
UK and India? exactly my point...probably biased....and besides, if this were the case, then more than half of the pple in pakistan should be "slow" (for lack of a better word)....and by the way, im more of a chemist than an biological scientist.....