Hmmmm. Yes kids should participate. My daughters have never been to a wedding and that’s because most have been back home and we weren’t able to go.
I think they would enjoy fun and frolic, the colors and excitement. However, I feel the exposure should be limited just for their sake. They will get tired and bored and eventually cranky…at least that’s what I see happening to other kids.
So let’s say you’re staying at a family home, you could hire a nanny from 10pm to 2am and drop your kids off so they could go to bed after getting their share of fun. Or if that’s not possible, then maybe some elder who doesn’t want to stick around can accompany them home…or I don’t know what else…