Re: Getting married within family
i dont know any relatives that are married to their cousins, most of the relatives married in my family are married to family friends. the closest relative married to their cousin is my cousin's cousin, but it wasnt arranged. they fell in love while chatting on msn.( i found that really funny).
Re: Getting married within family
I don’t find anything wrong with marrying a cousin, and if there were any eligible guys in my family I would. However, I find the concept of marrying in order totally … stupid for lack fo a better word. Now, I’m not trying to say that all our parents’ customs and way of thinking is BS (as was pointed out in my other thread 
) but if someone can give me a good decent reason why the older sibling MUST get married before the younger, then.. maybe…
Re: Getting married within family
Sara, this goes back to our daqyanossi traditions with no valid reason at all. Here is a sample of reasoning "What will the people say?" "Why did they marry the younger sister before the elder one...there must be something going on" "Maybe the elder is not good looking" etc etc...
Re: Getting married within family
Okay then... my official stance on this is : BULLSIHT. :)
I understand the reasoning behind marrying in family, but not this. Danke for clearing it up
Re: Getting married within family
im so glad my family doenst have that whole inter cousin marriage thing goin on. eww. well than again all my couins are in pakistan.
and the whole order thing i dont get it.. but my khala wants the girl to get married 1st and she has 2 older brothers who are like 20ish and shes 17
Re: Getting married within family
exactly
Re: Getting married within family
I don't mind marrying a cousin, i mean that is if they are well qualified and eligible enough. I don't think i have any eligible cousins in my family lol most are younger than me or WAY older.
Although I do believe my parents would be at ease knowing that i would be marrying someone within the family.
Re: Getting married within family
i made it very clear by my attitude with my cousins that they should never make a mistake to manipulate my parents. they didnt :D agar kar bhi detay tau mein bhi parents ko achi goli de deti.
one aunt was after my sister for her son. my sister had slapped him in childhood. when the son tried to get "comfortable" with her again, by reminding her abt that childhood misunderstanding, etc. etc. etc. in a family gathering. they were expecting her to blush and smile and express her acceptance. my sister said in front of everyone, "dusra thappar khanay ka irada hai?" (makes me proud of her :D )
Re: Getting married within family
LOL! Some of you are too funny! Degrading your cousins because they aren't good enough for you.
Re: Getting married within family
^ being this direct in family gathering may have not been the best choice (too much stupid family politics).
Re: Getting married within family
the little time we spent with cousins, we had the best, fun time with all. but we just wanted to be friends. the thought of having that sort of “relationship” with cousins was just so icky :yukh:
Re: Getting married within family
exactly ^
Re: Getting married within family
thk... U..Allahhh.. my parents always asked me before considering anyone. whether he/she be within the family or outsaide.
Re: Getting married within family
Not a big fan of it. Actually, totally against it. Though there have been cousin marriages in my family. I have seen that doesn't really matter where the bride comes from, eventually, there will be problems. So why take the risk of recycling genes and producing offsprings that necessitate that those offrspings will have to be married to their cousins as well...starting a vicious cycle. So, rather, marry outside the family. Please.
Besides, while cousin marriages are acceptable in Islam, they are not favored.
besides, how could you marry someone that you called Bhai all your life. grosss!
Re: Getting married within family
^ Technically every guy is "bhai" until ur married to him :D
Re: Getting married within family
yea...but i think there is a huge difference between saying it and well...not saying it.
Re: Getting married within family
I think its totally gross. Cousins (esp closer ones) are like brothers/sisters, and then suddently your expected to get your freak on with them?
Dude!?
Re: Getting married within family
ok this thread is going in wrong direction.. i don't care if ppl marry with cousins.. i don't have any problems with that.. as long as the couple is happy then they should do it.. but for parents to make it complosory and not even giving any chance for anything outside family is just wrong.. they should ask their children for their happiness too..
Re: Getting married within family
Here is a good reason not getting married within the family. BTW, this is a scientific report. Please do not drag religion into this.
Source: http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/articleshow/1298335.cms
MUMBAI: A research being carried out in Mumbai on deaf and mute children and their parents has revealed a startling coincidence - marrying within the family could lead to your kid ending up being deaf and/or dumb.
The Bandra-based Ali Yavar Jung National Institute for the Hearing Handicapped (AYJNIHH), and Bangalore-based Jawaharlal Nehru Centre for Advanced Scientific Research (JNCASR) have been working on the reasons behind genetic deafness, or deafness inherited down generations.
Over the past two years, they studied 165 couples across the city with deaf and/or mute offspring.
Of these, among 70 couples neither member is deaf or mute. But a vast majority had married within the family.
The researchers have sent blood samples of all the family members to JNCASR to check for the ‘connexin 26 mutation’, which causes genetic deafness, in the blood. The mutation transmits deafness down generations.
"Marriage within the family tree is just one of the reasons for genetic deafness. Inbreeding may harm children Other aspects of the malaise would emerge once the project is complete,†said Rajan Jalvi, head of department (audiology), AYJNIHH. Jalvi is heading the project under the supervision of Dr R Rangasayee, director, AYJNIHH.
The findings prompted researchers to advice concerned couples to desist from having more kids because the possibility of a child being deaf and/or mute could not be ruled out. They also advised couples to test the blood of the person their children to avoid the possibility of deaf and/or mute offspring.
Re: Getting married within family
You are so right. When one of my cousins was getting sweet on me, I told her she was like a sister to me.