Re: Experiences of living a dorm life…
Mustaqbil ko kiss ny dykha mustaqbil ka kisy patta hy:chai:
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life…
Yes it is. So? 
Well, if they grow up and have to go for college out of town then I guess I’d let them, but their dad will never! So why even bother. They can have fun at home, I promise.
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life…
No wonder why children of today complain how not-understanding and cruel their parents are but become the same when they grow older tomorrow :-p
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life…
Han khud ju advanture kiy hoty hain soch ker dill dehlta hy ky agar olad kery phir khiyal ata hy ammi abu kion pryshan hoty thy “bilawaja”
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life…
Whatever!
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life...
No wonder why children of today complain how not-understanding and cruel their parents are but become the same when they grow older tomorrow :-p
100% agreed however I am not one of those. My kids admit that they have a funny mom, woh like to do more childish things than them:D
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life…
No seriously… then, they would not have thrilling stories like you to tell to others
they will feel left out:(
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life...
No seriously... then, they would not have thrilling stories like you to tell to others
they will feel left out:(
They'll have lots of other thrills with ma and pa!
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life…
mine time will come..
..
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life...
No seriously... then, they would not have thrilling stories like you to tell to others
they will feel left out:(
Peace bro AQ
When you have kids you will see inshaAllah ...
I once saw a documentary where a girl was being interviewed and she said that she would do whatever she wanted and that if her mother had the 'freedom' to do those things then it would be hypocritical for her mother to prevent her. Also, she added that her mother lives today to learn from her mistakes so she wants to be in the same position.
This may sound fair, but to me it is a big problem:
Humanity will only progress if we do not keep making the same mistakes over in each generation. It is not wisdom that people learn from their mistakes, that is but common sense, it is however, wisdom when people learn from the mistakes of others so they don't have to experience the ills. The ills leave some people more careful but very much prone and weakened.
My father never used to do very bad or dangerous things not even in childhood, and he taught us this accordingly. However, I never knew why and I was given too much freedom when my folks saw that I had gone past them in education, but that was our collective mistake. My father was the wise one for never going to places that were risky. I had to learn the hard way. He thought by nesting us away from the harm was the way to keep us protected from it, but instead there were some gaps, like trust and in-depth explanation. If we do not engage in something harmful either bodily or spiritually we should know why so when people ask we can explain. It is not enough to 'just say no' or treat some subject as taboo giving 'silence' to your kids and expect them to listen or understand.
It is our Islamic responsibility to explain and encourage in the best ways to prevent them from harming themselves. We should do so in a way that makes them appeal to our sense of reasoning, and trust us in that and provide for them other ways to spend their time which are halal and harm free.
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life...
psyah
I agree
.
You cant baby your kids at all times, and the right values should be taught to them. They will still make mistakes so you need to engaged in their life and be there for guidance. Realize that I have never seen anyone who has said they have always done everything their parents expected. even those with the strictest parents.
I have said before that in my college days I did not always make the right decisions, however at some point out of no external caxing or convincing, i realized that enough was enough and I needed to walk away from some stuff.
But you know what, i was the one away from home living on my own, no one to check on me, complete freedom, but some of my partners in crimes ranging from clubbing to parties were guys and girls living at home including hijabis with strict folks.
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life...
I agree with both psyah and X2...
what I was saying was that we can not let our children deprive of something that is normal ... I understand we need to be protective but is dorm life really that scary? may be or may be not? I do not know.. I have never experienced it.. but whosoever, experienced it, has a bit better understanding of life from that point of view..
I enjoyed reading Ira's entry and I thought it was more of a fun than being in wrong place...
Does not it depend on "where" you are rather than generalizing it?
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life...
That is true AQ, what I have noticed is that when parents go overboard and too protective thats when you see massive rebellion so its counter productive. Or, even if that does not happen, the kids end up being unsure of themselves, lacking in confidence and lacking in ability to face the world like their peers do.
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life...
My parents were never overprotective about my sis and me but always made sure we knew that they trusted us. The confidence and friendship we had with them was a seed of conscience implanted in our brains. I wouldn't say we were the most obidient daughters, but we certainly never gave our parents any reason to get majorly ticked off!
My sister and I went to boarding school because when we moved from Africa back to India, the town where we were moving to was experiencing political and social unrest, and my parents thought we would be better off in a secure and calm environment for a few years. Moreover, the quality of education in those schools/college was far superior as compared to the local ones.
From my experience living in boarding school, I'd say it was a fantasatic experience as a result of which I have always been able to make confident decisions by myself, am disciplined and less fussy about little things and able to blend and deal with people from diverse backgrounds without any challenges.
However, that does not imply that one without the boarding school experience cannot have the same qualities.
As in everything, the key is in having balance.
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life...
I lived in a dorm on campus..We called our dorms 'houses' and I lived with 2 intelligent and beautiful girls. Nothing scandalous to report here. I was becoming more and more religious while being away from home, so I avoided any haram activities. Besides, we were all pretty busy with classes, activities, and work that we rarely saw each other during the week.
Both were really great girls who kept the place neat and clean. On the weekends they did cook during the afternoons but did not cook the haram animal because they knew that it would make me uncomfortable. One of the girls did drink wine from time to time, but only in her room. At least once a month we would hang out, go have dinner, or hit the gym.
They would have boyfriends and breakups, vacations and trips home..all through that we seemed to have managed pretty well. Never had a fight or argument. My friends would think that I was a lucky guy for living with two girls and would always make inappropriate remarks what they thought was going on in our suite, but we kept everything halal.
After graduating, we have still kept in touch. One went back to Greece to work in the Foreign Ministry and the other stayed in the States to become a TV reporter (maybe of your city?). When we met up last year at the big football game, when our school played Yale, it was like meeting your long lost sisters.
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life...
I lived in a dorm on campus..We called our dorms 'houses' and *I lived with 2 intelligent and beautiful girls. Nothing scandalous to report here. I was becoming more and more religious while being away from home, so I avoided any haram activities. Besides, we were all pretty busy with classes, activities, and work that we rarely saw each other during the week. *
Both were really great girls who kept the place neat and clean. On the weekends they did cook during the afternoons but did not cook the haram animal because they knew that it would make me uncomfortable. One of the girls did drink wine from time to time, but only in her room. At least once a month we would hang out, go have dinner, or hit the gym.
They would have boyfriends and breakups, vacations and trips home..all through that we seemed to have managed pretty well. Never had a fight or argument. My friends would think that I was a lucky guy for living with two girls and would always make inappropriate remarks what they thought was going on in our suite, but we kept everything halal.
After graduating, we have still kept in touch. One went back to Greece to work in the Foreign Ministry and the other stayed in the States to become a TV reporter (maybe of your city?). When we met up last year at the big football game, when our school played Yale, it was like meeting your long lost sisters.
Ya Allah aj kal ky zamany main aysa nyk ideal byta or shohar sab ko dy amen:D
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life...
AQ, thanks for appreciating my dorm life :) It sure was fun, mostly because of the friendships i made. We also did alot of crazy things though they were more attributed to school life rather than dorms. I remember they were constructing an IT center (UET's first) and me and friend U happened to pass by. We went in and saw that the mazdoors were putting in tiles on the floor in one ofthe class rooms. So we insisted on fitting one tile each just so we could say that we took part in building our university :D
In another instance , we made one construction worker let us ride on the bull dozer. He wouldnt let us start it though, just climb on it and act silly, which i am sure we did.
One time it was after school hours and we decided to go back to a shahtoot tree that we had seen loaded with fruit. Well, after U and I climed on the tree and were busy collecting shahtoot, we saw many faculty members driving by since that was the only way to get to the residence areas. I am sure they must be thinking waht two grown up girls were doing on top of a tree. It was fun nonetheless.
See, you got me started and now i cant stop.
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life…
ok bro.. you just saved yourself :-p
LOL! it’s quite imaginative. Normally it’s male’s domain to climb up the tree (I recall climbing on Mango trees many times)
I do not want you to stop anyway 
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life...
Ya Allah aj kal ky zamany main aysa nyk ideal byta or shohar sab ko dy amen:D
I hope you are not being sarcastic. In college, haram activities are all around us and you have to make a choice to whether you will participate in them or not. Having female roomies or not will not make a difference.
Re: Experiences of living a dorm life...
ok bro.. you just saved yourself :-p
Dude, you need to take it easy..Imaan isn't just challenged at the dorm room in your university, it is challenged everywhere.
In fact I have had more outrageous work related stories than during the college years. At my school, good grades and careers were a bigger focus than anything else. Sure there was partying, dating, and all of the other stuff but it was not like chico state where getting drunk or whorish would be the culture.