but now i am confused again of** whether i should do what islam says or what her will says**
personally i think i he does deserve some share in the jewelry
You need to do what will help you live the rest of your life in peace.
both my mom and him are not acting like adults and want the entire gold and asking them to understand the situation is very difficult since after her death they have not spoken and dont like each other.
I have no idea where your mother comes in all this. Her opinion/feelings/thoughts are not relevant and should not effect anything. Your mother was not there when your sister expressed her wishes. The jewelry was gifted to your sister and was her property. Why should your mother have a say in what happens with property that does not belong to her?
That is a problem. Even if this will is valid islamically, there are only two witnesses, you and your bro-in-law, and both differ in their recollection. Added to that, his status as a muslim is questionable, at the time this verbal will was made, which means he might not qualify to be a witness. Things are stacked against him and you are not on solid ground yourself. How certain are you that that is what your sister wanted? Any chance she changed her mind and made a new 'verbal' will? If I were you, I would negotiate and settle with him. Show him how all this is against him and how things could get worse for him if he goes to court.
The 40K he owes you cannot be part of this negotiation, because that is between you and him and has nothing to do with your sister's jewellery. Who owns the house? Do you pay any rent?
Don't listen to your mother and get all worked up on this. She is clearly in the wrong. May Allah give you all sabr and hikmah to deal with this all.
Ofcourse it can be part of negotiations, she gave it to him bcoz he was married to her sister. So when you are settling, you need to deduct that money.
because my mom says that all of it belongs to us and not him...so if i have to give him his share i have to do it without her knowing it.
We're discussing the issue of whether he gets the jewelry which is where your mother should not have a say b/c the jewelry did not belong to her. It belonged to your sister. Your mother can say whatever she wants to but her words should not effect your decision b/c she did not/does not have a right to decide who that jewelry belongs to. Whether you inform your mother of your final decision is a different issue.
Ofcourse it can be part of negotiations, she gave it to him bcoz he was married to her sister. So when you are settling, you need to deduct that money.
The reason it cannot be part of this negotiation is because, she is holding the jewelery and it would be like holding for a ransom. The main purpose of this negotiation is to settle this in an amicable manner so the relationships remain cordial going forward. Also it is a separate transaction altogether. Unless if the sister said she will pay her if her husband couldn't/wouldn't, it should not figure in this negotiation.
We're discussing the issue of whether he gets the jewelry which is where your mother should not have a say b/c the jewelry did not belong to her. It belonged to your sister. Your mother can say whatever she wants to but her words should not effect your decision b/c she did not/does not have a right to decide who that jewelry belongs to. Whether you inform your mother of your final decision is a different issue.
Just bcoz the jewelry is in her possession and not her mother's does not mean that mother has no say in the matter. She is Islamically one of the inheritors and is entitled to be counted in .
The reason it cannot be part of this negotiation is because, she is holding the jewelery and it would be like holding for a ransom. The main purpose of this negotiation is to settle this in an amicable manner so the relationships remain cordial going forward. Also it is a separate transaction altogether. Unless if the sister said she will pay her if her husband couldn't/wouldn't, it should not figure in this negotiation.
All financial transactions between two people are part of give and take. You cannot consider each separate. Giving back the debt is his first obligation and she has the right to take back what is hers.
Secondly, my point is, he does not have any right in inheritance of a muslim, whatever she gives him can be a gift and hence she can settle the debt.
so if i give him his share as per her will it would be considered as a gift and i not inheritance?
Frankly, you should consult the scholars, and local lawyers, but what I have understood, you can choose to give something to him as "gift", but then you need to consult other inheritors.
Just bcoz the jewelry is in her possession and not her mother's does not mean that mother has no say in the matter. She is Islamically one of the inheritors and is entitled to be counted in .
Why does the mother have a say in what happens with HIS half of the share? The mother should definitely receive her share and do whatever she wants to do with that. There is absolutely no dispute that the dead sister wanted that man to have half of the jewelry. There is 0 doubt about that. That jewelry belonged to that woman....it was her property. She shared her wishes with her sister while alive and trusted that her sister would carry out her wishes. Call it a gift, inheritance whatever......the title doesn't matter. The bottom line is that the dead sister wanted this man to have half of the jewelry she owned. Why should the mother or anyone else be able to come in now and claim ALL of the jewelry when the rightful owner was very clear about what should happen to the jewelry when she dies?
All financial transactions between two people are part of give and take. You cannot consider each separate. Giving back the debt is his first obligation and she has the right to take back what is hers.
Secondly, my point is, he does not have any right in inheritance of a muslim, whatever she gives him can be a gift and hence she can settle the debt.
The problem is, the will and inheritance is not between her and bro-in-law. It is between the her, her sister and bro-in-law, because they were involved at the time of 'will' making.
It would be his first obligation to pay her off, if we were talking about his will. While he is alive, he can pay off that debt however and whenever he and OP agree.
i need advice to handle a situation. the problem is that my sister married a christian who converted to Muslim to marry her.my sister died of stomach cancer a little while ago.her marriage lasted around 10 years. i used to live with her in UAE. Before she died she made a will (me and her husband as a witness) to distribute her jewelry among her husband and her family.
The following problems to be considered
before she died he converted back to christian which makes their marriage annulled
he calls me and says that before she died she told him that all the gold belongs to him
my mother says that it does not belong to him as he did not contribute a single penny any of the marriage jewelry (shaadi and walima wedding jewelry sets where bought by my mother)
my brother in law borrowed 40,000 dirhams from me (which after this i dont think i will be getting back)
i asked the scholar and he says that since he is was no a muslim and lied to her for 10 years it does not belong to him
at the moment all of her jewelry is with me. and since i used to live with them but she has died i don't know what to do .
how do i tell him (should i) that i have to give it to my mother?
i mean its their house and even it i do have the jewelry how should i do what my sister wanted?
rite now i am in Pakistan but i haven't told my mom or him anything cuz if i tell my mom she will take it all. i want to do what is rite
If by doing the right thing, you mean what is right according to Islam, then the first thing to look at is whether or not your sister was in debt. If she was, the estate should first be used to clear that up. You'll have to check with a scholar, but I believe burial expenses come next. Now what is left from that, a maximum of 1/3 can be willed. And heirs cannot be included in the will as they already have assigned portions of the estate.
Why does the mother have a say in what happens with HIS half of the share? The mother should definitely receive her share and do whatever she wants to do with that. There is absolutely no dispute that the dead sister wanted that man to have half of the jewelry. There is 0 doubt about that. That jewelry belonged to that woman....it was her property. She shared her wishes with her sister while alive and trusted that her sister would carry out her wishes. Call it a gift, inheritance whatever......the title doesn't matter. The bottom line is that the dead sister wanted this man to have half of the jewelry she owned. Why should the mother or anyone else be able to come in now and claim ALL of the jewelry when the rightful owner was very clear about what should happen to the jewelry when she dies?
You are missing the elephant in the room. The deceased married this guy "after" he converted to make this relation Islamic. He converted back "while she was alive" and hid it from her. The deceased sister did not know this, that her marriage Islamically is annulled. That's FRAUD.
The deceased sister wanted to give him her jewelry, thinking he was islamically still her husband.
At least to me that makes the will obtained frauduently and hence null and void. In which case you need to see what will be her mother's share if husband has no share.
She may decide to honour her sister by giving something as gift, that gift should come from her own money, not from her mothers share or that of other inheritors, unless they too consent to it.
The problem is, the will and inheritance is not between her and bro-in-law. It is between the her, her sister and bro-in-law, because they were involved at the time of 'will' making.
It would be his first obligation to pay her off, if we were talking about his will. While he is alive, he can pay off that debt however and whenever he and OP agree.
My point was, by law, he is not entitled to inheritance.
To me this is really weird. Gold jewelry is a very expensive gift and should be looked at differently than just normal gifts. I personally believe the jewelry SHOULD go back to the mother. If it were me and my husband, my husband would never want any of it anyway. Also, you should forget about the 40000 dirharms if your sister and brother in law supported you financially during that time you lived with them. That's just me.
You are missing the elephant in the room. The deceased married this guy "after" he converted to make this relation Islamic. He converted back "while she was alive" and hid it from her. The deceased sister did not know this, that her marriage Islamically is annulled. That's FRAUD. The deceased sister wanted to give him her jewelry, thinking he was islamically still her husband.
At least to me that makes the will obtained frauduently and hence null and void. In which case you need to see what will be her mother's share if husband has no share.
The problem I have is with this is all the assumptions….which is why I mentioned earlier that it really doesn't matter the details of this re-convervion (ie. he converted before marriage….wife didn't know but the sister did….but didn't tell the wife?).
The fact is that we don't know what the wife knew or didn't. We don't know what discussions took place b/t them in the private. We don't know for a FACT what the wife knew/thought or believed about the husband's initial conversion to Islam…as to whether it was genuine or not. At this point, we also don't know for a FACT that the wife would have left the husband, stopped loving/caring about him, and not left him the jewelry EVEN IF she knew that we converted back to Christianity. We can talk about what she should have done according to Islam, we can ASSUME what she may have done based on her personality etc…..but not a single person really knows for a fact what she would have actually done. It's all speculation at this point based on our own personal beliefs. Based on what OP wrote, the dead sister did not put any conditions to the jewelry division.
The one and only thing we know for a fact….that is not disputed at all is that while alive, the sister wanted half of the jewelry which was hers to go to this man. Period. At this point it simply boils down to whether or not OP is going to respect her dead sister's wishes….wishes that the sister herself actually told OP believing that OP could be trusted to carry it out.
You cannot look at one statement in isolation and neither can you disregard the laws of inheritance of Islam, for a muslim person, unless she specifically indicated it to her. Just my personal opinion.
You cannot look at one statement in isolation and neither can you disregard the laws of inheritance of Islam, for a muslim person, unless she specifically indicated it to her. Just my personal opinion.
We are both entitled to our own opinion. As I told OP earlier….none of us are burdened with this decision. The deceased woman was her sister, and spoke to her directly…and she is the ONLY one who has to live with her decision.
BTW, that statement made by the dead sister was based on her spending almost 10 years with this man…..a man who obviously made her very happy. So while we may be looking at that one statement…..the person who actually made it apparently considered many factors before making that statement. NONE of us knows for a fact what all those factors were. Again, at this point we can assume based on our own personal beliefs….but we really don't know for a fact.
^Again you are making a lot of assumptions. You are only factoring in that there was things between her and her husband and he is entitled. You are missing that there is a relation between her deceased sister her Creator. You don't want to do things that might go against her beliefs and if she does, she might have to live with that too.