Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

[khattichic]

Re: Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

i don't know guys, from my exeperience, the "aunties" in my city (yes, i'm in the US) are the most well groomed, put together women i've ever seen. sometimes even more so than their own daughters.

and as far as Pakistani aunties go, the only ones I know who are put together and well groomed and dressed to the nines 24/7 are the upper class elite. from what i've seen, most middle class people, men and women, all seem so much older and fatigued then their actual age. everyone always looks so tired and depressed. don't get me wrong, i would too if i had to live with all the power outtages, blackouts and sheer maslay that plague that wonderful country....

please don't take offense to my comments, this is strictly my experiences from my (extensive!) travels and vacations to Pakistan. And I do go back fairly regularly.

[Pseudonymous]

Re: Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

I think its the "grass is greener on the other side" syndrome.

Aunties in the West: They want to desperately hold on to traditional cultural/religious values and dont' want their children "corrupted" by Western influence. Hence many families I know are strict about things like dress codes in the family. They feel this is one way they can hold onto "tradition".

Aunties in the East: They want to imitate western way of dressing and think its cool. They're not freaked out about themselves and their children losing traditional values.

As for gromming of the aunties themselves.....the aunties I know who're financially well-off here (U.S.) are groomed just as well as the aunties in the East. The aunties I know that don't dress "well" usually work full-time jobs (family wouldn't be defined as wealthy), don't get much help with household chores etc.

Disclaimer: The above comments are solely based on my peresonal experience with aunties I have met, observed, or heard about through people I know. I realize that there are many aunties out where who do not fit into these categories.

I agree. Most of my cousins in Pakistan, and many of the older auntys I know are more fashion fwd and are very much into grooming themselves and constantly finding ways of beautifying themselves. I think this largely has to do with the availability of "nokers" in Pakistan and these women not having all the work and responsibilities that we females abroad have.

[Moodie_Foodie]

Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

Desi women in the east not only have access to tailors and derzis but have access to time as well. Most women in pakistan and I am talking about middle and upper class here havr naukranis coming in and out to clean the house, wash the dishes, cook, dhobhiwalas and a lot of them have personal drivers. Why wouldn't they have time to attend lawn exhibitions and keep themselves maintained. Women in the west have to take care of their house, husband, children, and work. Their time is precious in a sense ke their isnt an abundance of it. I understand so many people are selling trendy clothes and not everyone can afford it. If u cant buy designer lawn in pakistan, u can still get a suit from a regular vender n get it stitched for 1/4 of the price. Another thing is over there, women are constantly running into each other and that serves as an incentive to keep yourself groomed. Over here, you run into the desi crowd once in a while (atleast where i live) and its not worth it to waste money getting clothes made for a possible party. I do get stuff made but I rarely get to wear it. I personally don't wear sleeveless but I wouldn't say someone who wears is more trendier. In my eyes, you are groomed if you are showered, smell good, waxed, and wearing decent clothes.

[Paheli00]

Re: Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

Correct and these days right shops are all over the internet in the name of Facebook vendors. I know many people who havn't been to Pakistan in ages yet they wear the most trendy stuff.

^ Correct. As you wrote earlier, it's a combination of having a sense of style and being able to afford it. Even without shopping online........Trendy, good quality, well-made outfits are available in the U.S. too.....but they also come with a price. And besides, most "aunties" I know who fit in that category also make regular trips to Pakistan or India.

[NS2]

Iv seen groomed aunties from the west but not trendy ones since its hard to follow pak fashion there-few shops-not the lastest trendy clothes available there-no tailors-no time-even simple clothes cost alot as compared to local clothes in pak..as for sleeveless not many people prefer that, even here..just the elite..

[_MuNiYa]

Re: Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

Clothes aside - Desi Aunties in the west look like they crawled out of bed. Some will be pushing strollers with toddlers who look equally as messy. They dont speak a word to the babies unless they're reprehending them - the over all look is of an unhappy oppressed woman.

[automne77]

Re: Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

Most of the ladies who are well groomed here in the US and Canada are ones who can afford it and who have access to different services. Some women who I have come across in N. America who stay at home don't really bother with grooming themselves. I guess all that housework, kids takes a toll on them.

In the gulf that is not the case, most women have access to a part time maid and a laundry guy, restaurants are plenty and beauty services are easily available and very affordable.

Now if only I could get my beauty service provider here to Canada, I would be a very well groomed aunty ahem young girl

[Mabrook]

Re: Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

When you say "Aunties" what age group u refer to? 30-40-50-60?
as for my observation ladies here in calgary dye and straighten their hair more skillfully plus many go to gym and are more fit shape wise. they wear very fashionable clothes too. But then there is the simple lot too who doesn't bother abt high fashion much and stay in their comfort zone.

in pak i see most ladies after kids kinda lose it. Even in Isl its same, they may wear sleeveless, sunglasses or branded clothes but have shapeless, over weighed structure with tons of wrinkles hidden behind makeup.as for going sleeveless that has nothing to do with being broad minded or well groomed. its a religious thing and by following religion u cant be less fashionable, well put or updated.

[TT]

Re: Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

Clothes aside - Desi Aunties in the west look like they crawled out of bed. Some will be pushing strollers with toddlers who look equally as messy. They dont speak a word to the babies unless they're reprehending them -** the over all look is of an unhappy oppressed woman**.

I have noticed that as well. I think a lot of them are new immigrants who are homesick. It's understandable that they look that way.

[_MuNiYa]

Re: Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

really homesick - now I feel bad. Maybe I’ll go befreind one I see next.

[mama_ki_dua]

Re: Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

The only thing I'd agree with is the sleeveless thing. But you have to keep in mind, its only rich aunties in big cities in Pakistan who wear sleeveless kameezes or sleeveless blouses with their saris. Most other older women in Pakistan do not.

Most of the aunties I have encountered here or in Pakistan, always look nice and well-groomed. Yeah not everyone's a fashionista, but then again they are of the mentality that their past their prime and dont need to follow trends.

Jolie- the OP did ask if our observations differed. She didnt say what she observed is the ultimate truth and you must accept it, ya know.

Unfortunately some people here are too quick to criticise from their multis. It's nice to see people actually reading the post properly :)

Yeah thats what I said earlier, I think I'm reading too much into Paheli's "interpretations".

It seems like you're reading and misinterpreting too much of my initial and Paheli's posts. It's just a thread my friend, you can relax :)

[mama_ki_dua]

Re: Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

The only thing I'd agree with is the sleeveless thing. But you have to keep in mind, its only rich aunties in big cities in Pakistan who wear sleeveless kameezes or sleeveless blouses with their saris. Most other older women in Pakistan do not.

Most of the aunties I have encountered here or in Pakistan, always look nice and well-groomed. Yeah not everyone's a fashionista, but then again they are of the mentality that their past their prime and dont need to follow trends.

Jolie- the OP did ask if our observations differed. She didnt say what she observed is the ultimate truth and you must accept it, ya know.

Yeah thats what I said earlier, I think I'm reading too much into Paheli's "interpretations".

Clothes aside - Desi Aunties in the west look like they crawled out of bed. Some will be pushing strollers with toddlers who look equally as messy. They dont speak a word to the babies unless they're reprehending them - the over all look is of an unhappy oppressed woman.

This is something i've been observing with quite a lot of women

Most of the ladies who are well groomed here in the US and Canada are ones who can afford it and who have access to different services. Some women who I have come across in N. America who stay at home don't really bother with grooming themselves. I guess all that housework, kids takes a toll on them.

In the gulf that is not the case, most women have access to a part time maid and a laundry guy, restaurants are plenty and beauty services are easily available and very affordable.

Now if only I could get my beauty service provider here to Canada, I would be a very well groomed aunty ahem young girl

True but with some people they do have the money but theyr don't have the heart to spend on themselves. They would constantly save up for their kids etc put would refuse to spend some on themselves ( beauty treatments, up to date clothes etc)

When you say "Aunties" what age group u refer to? 30-40-50-60? as for my observation ladies here in calgary dye and straighten their hair more skillfully plus many go to gym and are more fit shape wise. they wear very fashionable clothes too. But then there is the simple lot too who doesn't bother abt high fashion much and stay in their comfort zone.

in pak i see most ladies after kids kinda lose it. Even in Isl its same, they may wear sleeveless, sunglasses or branded clothes but have shapeless, over weighed structure with tons of wrinkles hidden behind makeup.as for going sleeveless that has nothing to do with being broad minded or well groomed. its a religious thing and by following religion u cant be less fashionable, well put or updated.

What i'm trying to say is that women in Pakistan are more tolerant towards sleeveless than some women here. I agree with the bit about some people being simple. Therefore, not bothering with grooming, clothes etc. However, it would be nice for everybody to make an effort. You don't have to go overboard.

[Mabrook]

Re: Desi aunties in the West v Desi aunties in the East

^ok so the main point was tolerance to sleeveless lol. ok i don't like it too. banday k toned arms honay chahian aur Allah ki permission bhi ho :) well u can wear them anyways esp in private parties. ppl will get used to it eventually. i see many mod women wearing them here too where i live.