You are so right about being rational and realistic! In many dawats I have found that I wouldn’t be realistic everything would be behind schedule and I would literally look flustered and couldn’t be as calm as I would have liked. For example for Iftar parties I have learned the hard way that I should limit fried items. These can only be made an 1 hr in advance or become soggy so now I dont mak pakoras for a substantial crowd. Instead I do foods that I can make ahead of time. Pakoras taste horrible from catered place because they need to be fried and consumed right away. They have a very short shelf life just like french fries.
Please please do open dawat thhread. It will help a lot of immensely!