Re: Calling all men!!
No training lesson from begum. Three factors played a role
1- parents- my dad moved to UK for masters in his early 20s and then lived all over the world as a bachelor so got in the habit of managing everything on his own. Later he and my mum also taught us everything in order to be able to live independently and not feel helpless. some things seem simple but it was amazing to see later how some guys did not know how to do stuff or did a pathetic job at it.
2- Living on my own- moved to loive with grandparents at 14, and then on my own at 16 in a different country, away from everyone, and had to manage everything on my own- my place was always well maintained clothes properly ironed, shoes polished, food cooked, asked the landlord permission and painted my flat all nice, framed and hung pictures, changed light fixtures, replaced showerheads, stained and waxed wood counters.. while my peers lived like a bunch of cavemen. Now the plus side of that was that my bachelor pad was a place that the honeys actually wanted to hang out .. i dont think thats what my mum had in mind when she got us ready for independent living but lets just say when you are 19-20 and have a slick place..it has its benefits.
3- i have had plenty of opportunities to see men who are just lame, some in my own khandaan some in community, just because they bring a paycheck they feel like they dont have to do anything at home, even if the wife works and even if she makes more, or sadly in a case where only the wife works. the dudes sit on their asses expect to be catered to because something as simple as changing a kids diaper, cooking a meal or loading the dishwasher makes them less of a man or something . a repulsive behavior that I dont even want to be close to.
PS: I make coffee every morning too, or rather set it at night time with a timer for it to brew when we wake up, great to have a hot cup of coffee first thing in the morning without having to actually make it.
you r right and yur wife is lucky to have a husband like u. Desi men r raised with thinking that just becz they r men they r not suppose to do any household chores , even if it means ironing their own clothes or fixing a meal for themselves. before marriage its sister and mother and after marriage wife has to do it all. my 2 brothers been living in US for past 20 years and they have changed a lot , they do help out their wives on daily basis, otherwise before they were also like typical desi men.
my badluck we moved to arab country so no such exposure for my husband, but still he has changed a little, HE CAN MAKE TEA.