Re: Business Travelers
Fraudz, thanks but do you know in these few weeks she was with me, there were very few occasions we shared a laugh. mostly, we were quiet.... you know.... i feel like a failure. i failed. im a weak b!tch.
bye for now
Re: Business Travelers
you know, Faudia saab. one day i was missing dad alot. so i called him. i had something to tell him. he took too long to come over the phone. and then… while i was telling him what i wanted to, i felt it did not have his attention and just to make sure if he was there listening, i said something like, " are you there…" and i heard a louuuudd… “OUUZZZATTTTT”… i was like WTF… i was waiting there for someone to pick up the phone and tell me what was going on. oh i had to disconnect and call again. then my mom picked up and told me there was a cricket match going on and i had called at a crucial time. sigh
Re: Business Travelers
TNW-
as far as your mum goes... i dont know if you have a close relationship, if you dont then it takes work, if you do then maybe there were things, commitments, etc on your side or maybe distractions or issues your mum was dealing with that got in the way of quality time. You know, not all quality time is spent laughing..one of my fondest memories of my parents trip this time was sitting on the floor with my back resting against my dad's legs wh was on the couch reading a paper, and we were passing sections and interesting stories etc as well as bargains on electronics back and forth to one another. much of the time we were quiet.
Now as far as your dad goes, i can completely understand the distraction. I am very close to my brothers but sometimes when they call I have something else going on or vice versa, in that case either we deal with a little distraction, or call back in a bit. if something is important, at times it is hard to guess and one may have to state hey I need to talk to you and get your advise or your feedback, let me know when we can talk.
On the possible issue of closeness with parents, it takes effort. I had become very alienated from my parents in my teens, and to be very honest, during my undergrad they were there, and mostly served as a bank, they could not do anything about it, and I did not do anything about it, Things got so bad that at one point I was mad at them because they had hid the news about the death of a friend from me, that i broke off all contact with them for almost 8 months..this was when I was 20. Later the anomosity ended from my side but the closeness just was not there. I had to engage them, open up to them, and be very honest. I had to sit down and tell them that I did not think we were as close as we should be and the fault was mine for being an ass, and that i realized they were a bit cautious around me because they did not know what will set me off again. I noted that was in the past and I would like things to be different. Things have been different,a nd been wonderful alhumdulillah.
Re: Business Travelers
Fraudia Bhai, and also TheNewWannaBe,
My Dad and I, never saw Eye to Eye, (He was another Hitler where discipline was concerned) till he was Healthy, but when he got his First Paralysis Attack, and could not move or talk, it broke my heart, and until he Passed away in Jan 2004, I would sit by his bed for Hours and think back on things I could have done different, to show all the love I had for him, but I never managed to show him, and also all the love he had for me but he never managed to show me.
Thats one of the reasons I make it a point to tell my kids I love them Atleast once a day. Specially after my own Heart Attack in Dec of 2004, I dont ever want my kids to think I didnt love them. NEVER EVER.
I think I got a bit too mushy there:D , but you can only realise the value of something after you have lost it, until then you just take it for granted.
Re: Business Travelers
Aejaz
you are very correct, I learnt from my cousin who had all kinds of regrets when his father passed away. They did not see eye to eye for years and while they lived under the same roof, and did not have open hostility, the closeness that they had vanished, and he regrets it to this day.
Re: Business Travelers
you're right abt the "other commitments" part. this is what tortures me the most. but I feel better already Fraudia, thank you.
Aejaz - Im so sorry to heard abt your father. May you have all the happiness of your own children and family.