What I wrote was meant to be humorous....at least to me anyways. If you read the last part of my post, "Of course most of us are too RESPECTFUL to go around harrassing people in general, LET ALONE AUNTIES, with nosy questions. SO we just end up giving a polite vague response and making a getaway. All these brilliant cheeky responses come to us WAY LATER...when the auntis have left. LOL!" That implies that I don't go around giving cheeky responses to Aunties and their nosey questions. I simply give them polite answers and go about my way. All the "smart answers" I would have liked to give come to me in my own privacy after the auntis have left. Being single (especially), I fully understand the unfavorable consequences that would result if heaven forbid I do give a "smart answer." But it doesn't hurt to exaggerate a situation and get a laugh from coming up with silly/ ridiculous (although impractical) possibilities.
no wonder you are REDVELVET [single]
i too once was MAKHMALI...but now a saieen [married]
PS: i don't have a funny bone...waise to bohhat hain...lakin sari ki sari sariyal hain.
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i too once was MAKHMALI...but now a saieen [married]**
Aaaaw, that's so sad. Considering the current roughness, its hard to imagine a previous existence of any sort of makhmaliness. The sarial bones part, however, seems less contradictory. Vaisay, i thought my post was lightheartedly amusing in my mind, so I posted. In no way, was it meant to particulary tickle or appeal to ANY of your bones.
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i too once was MAKHMALI...but now a saieen [married]**
Aaaaw, that's so sad. Considering the current roughness, its hard to imagine a previous existence of any sort of makhmaliness. The sarial bones part, however, seems less contradictory. Vaisay, i thought my post was lightheartedly amusing in my mind, so I posted. In no way, was it meant to particulary tickle or appeal to ANY of your bones.
The problem with these cheeky remarks is is that most Aunties don't understand English. They will look at you speechless, but mostly because they dont know what you're talking about. They will also consider you rude, because it is rude. Rudeness should not be answered with rudeness. Two wrongs don't make a right.
Anyways.....I have become an expert at dealing with these questions, RESPECTFULLY ( I believe in RESPECT, afterall these aunties ARE many times older then you . They are someone's mother).
This is what I do when people ask me rude questions. One time an Auntie asked me my weight (IN FRONT OF EVERYONE). I looked at her and smiled at her. I DID NOT SAY ANYTHING. After 30 seconds, it became so AWKWARD>>>>PPL started STARING AT HER!! She then said something like you're so thin, you should eat (I have the opposite problem, I'm really bony and look like a walking skeleton), blah blah blah.
The point is YOU DON'T HAVE TO ANSWER EVERY QUESTION AUNTIES ASK YOU!!!! **It feels wierd doing at first to just remain silent. Just smile (and if it's EXTREMELY RUDE> DON'T SMILE) and **don't answer. if they ask again (sometimes they think you didn't hear them), REMAIN SILENT. THEY will change the SUBJECT THEMSELVES!!!!! Once they change subject, return to normal convo.
This way you will not be considered rude. (in fact, other people will think they ARE RUDE, and you handled it well). I learned this techniqie from my parents.
And believe me, you will get people that will compliment you for this. The auntie who asked me my weight- her OWN daughter later told me "i really liked how you handled the situation."!
The problem with these is is that most Aunties don't understand English. They will look at you speechless, but mostly because they dont know what you're talking about.
Anyways.....I have become an expert at dealing respectfully with these questions, RESPECTFULLY.
This is what I do when people ask me rude question. One time an Auntie asked me my weight (IN FRONT OF EVERYONE). I looked at her and smiled at her. I DID NOT SAY ANYTHING. After 30 seconds, it became so AWKWARD>>>>PPL started STARING AT HER!! she then said something like you're so thin, you should eat (i have the opposite problem, i'm really bony and look like walking skeleton), blah blah blah.
The point is YOU DON"T HAVE TO ANSWER EVERY QUESTION AUNTIES ASK YOU!!!! **It feels wierd doing at first to just remain silent. Just smile (and if it's EXTREMELY RUDE< DON"T SMILE) and **don't answer. if they ask again (sometimes they think you didn't hear them), REMAIN SILENT. THEY will change the SUBJECT THEMSELVES!!!!! Once they change subject, return to normal convo.
this way you will not be considered rude. (in fact other people will think they ARE RUDE, and you handled it well). I learned this techniqie from my parents.
And believe me you will get people, that will compliment you for this. The auntie who asked me my weight- her OWN daughter later told me "i realy liked how you handled the situation."!
Choti Jaan,
If you look at the last paragraph in my post, it implies that usually I deal with the aunties in a polite/respectful manner although they may not deserve it at the time. My post with its ridiculous ideas was simply out of fun. Kind of like those forwards you might get in your email containing a list of things you can say to annoy telemarketers. Believe me I've dealt with my share of aunti comments about my weight, hair, skin, job, major, what have you. There are some aunties who say things out of genuine concern and a sincere desire to help. And then there are some who have other intentions. And I've dealt with all of them quite politely and tactfully. I am aware of the consequences of "talking back" to an elder as it can potentially hurt your rep. At the same time, I don't always believe in being a pushover. Once in a while, if you see that someone is getting WAY OUT OF HAND, then they need to be "decently" put in their place. And there are several ways of doing that without being rude such as staying quiet (as you suggested) and that makes them look like the one who has messed up. Your "staying quiet" strategy was meant to tactfully put that aunti in her place and make her and everyone else realize her mistake. I just wanted to clarify myself for you. I get it.
^ That's good tip. It's easier said than done though:-)
Yes, it is hard in the beginning. It takes some tries to get used to the awkwardness of it. But you get used to it, and then it becomes so easy! You just have to start.
I started doing this when I was 8 or 9 (Aunties prey on little kids- "so what is you're parents job, arghhhhhh). I wasn't perfect then, and I'd slip here and there- and my mother would give me a lecture on why I felt the need to answer that lady's question. So I guess having a mom helping me out there helped.
If you look at the last paragraph in my post, it implies that usually I deal with the aunties in a polite/respectful manner although they may not deserve it at the time. My post with its ridiculous ideas was simply out of fun. Kind of like those forwards you might get in your email containing a list of things you can say to annoy telemarketers. Believe me I've dealt with my share of aunti comments about my weight, hair, skin, job, major, what have you. There are some aunties who say things out of genuine concern and a sincere desire to help. And then there are some who have other intentions. And I've dealt with all of them quite politely and tactfully. I am aware of the consequences of "talking back" to an elder as it can potentially hurt your rep. At the same time, I don't always believe in being a pushover. Once in a while, if you see that someone is getting WAY OUT OF HAND, then they need to be "decently" put in their place. And there are several ways of doing that without being rude such as staying quiet (as you suggested) and that makes them look like the one who has messed up. Your "staying quiet" strategy was meant to tactfully put that aunti in her place and make her and everyone else realize her mistake. I just wanted to clarify myself for you. I get it.
the thing is with the responses you dont want to sound rude/chalak cos lets be honest aunties like to gossip about so and so's daughter being 'itni chalak toba' BUT i do get sick of the questions so i try to think of a fast response. then in my mind i'm thinkin 'mommy save me'.
For this same reason I buy stuff from some shop which sells one of a kind shirt, trousers, shoes, ties , lungies , under wears, briefs. Nobody can copy me. when I go to a shop to buy a shirt for example I would see at least 10 of that color and designs and size. So I buy all of them so that nobody in the city can buy what I liked and bought. That is the only way to stop some one else to copy me. In chotay logoon key itnee himmat k maree copy karain gay, nalaiq , ahmaq.
