a general question to married ladies..

[cute_ainee]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

@Decent_6Chora

I know question was directed toward married ladies but hey…what the…so, as long as he is not “ignoring” you and just sticking to his nature i.e. non-talkative, there is nothing to worry about. Everyone is wired differently. In most of the cases, hubby/wife talk more freely on many topics when they are among friends and less when they are alone together. Men are mostly quiet in nature and you have to pull them out of their shell to talk.

Try to find common topic in fact just step into his domain. Sometimes, find a common activity such as cleaning house together, cooking etc etc and that helps the conversions going. I and sure this will help else just start murmuring “khamoshiaan gungunay lageen…tanhieyaan muskuraney lageen…”

PS: I just finished chatting (for about 15 min) with my begum with no particular topic just because I asked for a cup of tea …but hey, it tastes good

lol last thing is funny

[candy_apple]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

Never had this problem in our 4 years of dating and 5 years of marriage. My hubby is not as talkative as I am but if you get him started on a topic he really has an opinion on then oh boy can he go on and on and on...

I on the other hand am always talking....about anything and everything under the sun. My hubby and I often have REALLY long pillow talks that last for 2 hours (even on week nights) then he's like "omg I could have gone to sleep 2 hours ago but you kept me awake" BAHAHAHAHAH

My hubby always says I talk too much.

[cute_ainee]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

^ i always want to be a talkative girl but thats just not me..i like girls who always have something to talk about :)

[Shareen123]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

@cute_ainee

when u and ur husband are at home,do u speak alot?i mean on weekends when both of u have to spend all day together,do u talk most of the time or u start doing ur own work and husband does his own things like office work or something?me and my husband are not that talkative..when we are out,its better but when we are at home,he usually sits on his laptop and i am watching my own dramas or something..we literally dont have anyyyyyy thing to talk about...and we even laugh at it that we have nothing to talk about..we dont have kids yet..is it normal?is it same with u guys too?

Me and my husband were the same believe me It can never be normal, I thought it was normal until I got hold of my husband itemised calls billing where I found out he has been chatting to this random lady for 2 years and the worse thing is she was a family friend and he hid this from me up until this day he is not telling me what they use to chat about.
It really hurted me knowing he could talk to some other lady for hours and at home he wouldn't talk to me about anything else other than normal things like he would need something doing etc.
He says to me all men don't discuss things and can disclose things from their wives and don't have to tell them as long as the wife is well looked after.
I would advise you to keep an eye on him.
I was like you let him do what he wants and I would do my things.

[BellaShabba]

Shareen i know you have had a negative experience but doesnt mean all men who are quiet are talking to other ladies.??

My hubby works 7 days a week i also work full time when wer home we catch up but there are times he is on his playstation i have my feet up watching tv and wont say a word to each other lol pillow talk often happens depending how tired we are. Away from work and home if wer out its always easier to relax and catch up

[quote="cute_ainee"]

when u and ur husband are at home,do u speak alot?i mean on weekends when both of u have to spend all day together,do u talk most of the time or u start doing ur own work and husband does his own things like office work or something?me and my husband are not that talkative..when we are out,its better but when we are at home,he usually sits on his laptop and i am watching my own dramas or something..we literally dont have anyyyyyy thing to talk about...and we even laugh at it that we have nothing to talk about..we dont have kids yet..is it normal?is it same with u guys too?

Me and my husband were the same believe me It can never be normal, I thought it was normal until I got hold of my husband itemised calls billing where I found out he has been chatting to this random lady for 2 years and the worse thing is she was a family friend and he hid this from me up until this day he is not telling me what they use to chat about.
It really hurted me knowing he could talk to some other lady for hours and at home he wouldn't talk to me about anything else other than normal things like he would need something doing etc.
He says to me all men don't discuss things and can disclose things from their wives and don't have to tell them as long as the wife is well looked after.
I would advise you to keep an eye on him.
I was like you let him do what he wants and I would do my things.
[/QUOTE]

[amber19]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

It's the opposite in my home. If I'm quiet, my husband gets alarmed... it's like he needs me to be a constant non-stop talking radio for him. lol
But we always end up with something or other to talk about - and our conversations start with one thing and end up somewhere completely different.

Some couples are just quieter and enjoy it that way, so it's not a big deal. :) As long as you guys are comfortable with it then it's all good.

[OYMWA]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

I think electronic free weekends or evenings are a fantastic idea that you guys should try. Both of you need alone time and how much of that is needed varies by person so generally it's not an issue.

yeh konsa naya azaab soch laye! Yeh tho double azaab hai.

[OYMWA]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

But we always end up with something or other to talk about - and our conversations start with one thing and end up somewhere completely different.

In short, your home is Gupshup Cafe.

[PyariCgudia]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

My parents are always yapping with each other or us.

[X2]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

yeh konsa naya azaab soch laye! Yeh tho double azaab hai.

Haha stealth sales campaign for google glass

[pakieyez]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

I've noticed the same thing as well. We even eat our meals in front of the television set while watching a show. Recently we got a new dining table and have decided to test it out by eating on it for a few days which is far from a television set (otherwise we would have left it on). Anyways I realized that when we sit at the dining table we talked for so long not even realizing it. For some reason eating is correlated with chatting. Do you two only eat at the dining table? try doing that. you'd be surprised.

[S_and_S]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

Its so funny my cousin who does counseling says she always advices her couples to have dinners at their dining table with the TV off. She's like people don't even realize it but something or another will come up and it leads to more conversation. Its like theres nothing else to do while your having dinner so you end up asking the other person how they're day went or things that happened and it will lead into a conversation you were never expecting! It worked for us too!

But Op we also have the same habit. He's more talkative than me actually but when he's watching his tv ill be upstairs doing something else. When were at home were always doing our thing like right now he's sleeping and Im on gupshup lol. Its funny if you go out to a restaurant and just observe couples around you, the ones who are married are always sitting their in silence and dating couples are always chatting away and their body language is completely different. I think people stop trying with out even realizing it but being at home I feel like its really normal unless a particular topic or discussion is on the docket. My husband and I usually do all of our talking in the car and by the time were home theres no story left to tell lol

[cute_ainee]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

@pakieyez

I've noticed the same thing as well. We even eat our meals in front of the television set while watching a show. Recently we got a new dining table and have decided to test it out by eating on it for a few days which is far from a television set (otherwise we would have left it on). Anyways I realized that when we sit at the dining table we talked for so long not even realizing it. For some reason eating is correlated with chatting. Do you two only eat at the dining table? try doing that. you'd be surprised.

@S_and_S

Its so funny my cousin who does counseling says she always advices her couples to have dinners at their dining table with the TV off. She's like people don't even realize it but something or another will come up and it leads to more conversation. Its like theres nothing else to do while your having dinner so you end up asking the other person how they're day went or things that happened and it will lead into a conversation you were never expecting! It worked for us too!

But Op we also have the same habit. He's more talkative than me actually but when he's watching his tv ill be upstairs doing something else. When were at home were always doing our thing like right now he's sleeping and Im on gupshup lol. Its funny if you go out to a restaurant and just observe couples around you, the ones who are married are always sitting their in silence and dating couples are always chatting away and their body language is completely different. I think people stop trying with out even realizing it but being at home I feel like its really normal unless a particular topic or discussion is on the docket. My husband and I usually do all of our talking in the car and by the time were home theres no story left to tell lol

yeah we dont eat at dining table..may be that can be a good idea..and yes same is with us that doing all the talking in car and nothing is left wen at home..even now its weekend and my husband is busy with mobile in bedroom and i am sitting in lounge watching tv and GSing😛

[StrangeOne]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

Go out on a date every few days.

[cute_ainee]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

lol date after 4 years of marriage 😏..

[Aaze]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

@cute_ainee

lol date after 4 years of marriage ..

What's wrong with that? :)

[Paheli00]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

@cute_ainee

lol date after 4 years of marriage ..

Why not? I know plenty of couples who've been married for years…..some have kids….who regularly go out on dates.

[cute_ainee]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

we live alone and we dine out veryyyyyy frequently..at times its almost daily..then allllll the time we r together wherever we go except the time wen my husband is in office..so still is there any room left for dating 😁

[Paheli00]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

@cute_ainee

we live alone and we dine out veryyyyyy frequently..at times its almost daily..then allllll the time we r together wherever we go except the time wen my husband is in office..so still is there any room left for dating 

2 Thoughts come to to mind:

1. Perhaps both of you need to do things separately so you’re not with one another ALL the time. I’m surprised that you don’t have your own friends and he doesn’t have his own to hang out with. This would also give you things to talk about when you are together.

2. Dating after marriage can involve much more than just dinner. Go bowling, out to a movie, some type of show etc. Point of going on a “date” is that time you both put on some extra effort to look nice and do something extra apart from your daily lives. If going out to dinner is a daily thing for you guys….then do something else. Even with dinner, I’m guessing you guys aren’t going to fancy restaurants every day where he has to wear a suit and you have to doll-up head to toe….so perhaps that is a option. Since you two dine out so frequently….maybe start taking cooking classes together?

Another great option is weekend getaways. Whether its a resort, going hiking/camping whatever….make plans go leave on a Friday night and return Sunday night. It can even be a city an hour or two away…..or perhaps another place that’s a easy 1-2 hour by plane.

[pkgrl000]

Re: a general question to married ladies..

Has anybody actually tried one of those couples cooking or dance classes? I thought that was only for old empty nesters. Lol

@Paheli00

2 Thoughts come to to mind:

1. Perhaps both of you need to do things separately so you’re not with one another ALL the time. I’m surprised that you don’t have your own friends and he doesn’t have his own to hang out with. This would also give you things to talk about when you are together.

2. Dating after marriage can involve much more than just dinner. Go bowling, out to a movie, some type of show etc. Point of going on a “date” is that time you both put on some extra effort to look nice and do something extra apart from your daily lives. If going out to dinner is a daily thing for you guys….then do something else. Even with dinner, I’m guessing you guys aren’t going to fancy restaurants every day where he has to wear a suit and you have to doll-up head to toe….so perhaps that is a option. Since you two dine out so frequently….maybe start taking cooking classes together?

Another great option is weekend getaways. Whether its a resort, going hiking/camping whatever….make plans go leave on a Friday night and return Sunday night. It can even be a city an hour or two away…..or perhaps another place that’s a easy 1-2 hour by plane.